There is much in the actions of the Trump presidency that makes me uncomfortable and queasy; that stirs anger and provokes dismay; that erodes my pride and joy in being an American. But nothing has affected me as much as the recent executive orders for the “Muslim ban” and “The Wall.” These decisions of course are no surprise after months of bilious rhetoric from the Trump camp but nevertheless serve as a severe gut punch to anyone like myself that still held hope that core American ideals would overcome knee-jerk isolationism.

What has particularly concerned me throughout is not related to potential policy or legislation changes (though I am concerned about those as well) but how the ethos and the spirit of this country is being transformed. Hatred and marginalization of “others” is becoming normalized and mainstream – and these concepts have no place in this nation. Ours is a country with a flawed and checkered past but we have moved inexorably (albeit slowly but nevertheless inexorably) toward a tolerant and progressive society. Those that have held that progress back are now in positions of power to do more harm than ever before in my lifetime.

There is a personal aspect to this. I myself am not Muslim and I have a general disregard for all religion. My family, however, is Muslim; my background and my forebears come from a culture that identifies as much with Islam as it does anything else. While this does have some bearing on my reaction, my fear and concern does not spring from any perceived threat on my own identity or those of my family and friends as Muslims. This is about my faith in the American system itself. This is about my faith in the American people. How can a country built on the fruits of inclusion and integration support those who so clearly reject those ideals?

I am no patriot, and I am no nationalist. But I am an American. I am not ignorant of the terrible faults and crimes that this country has perpetrated through its existence but I truly believe that this is the greatest country in the world and quite possibly in the history of human civilization. Despite everything, this is a country that welcomes diversity and inclusion on a scope never before seen and while progress is sometimes painfully slow progress is made.

But my faith in the country and the people of this country is shaken. In my lifetime, there has never been such a widespread and overt push against diversity. My generation has been blessed with a country that has on the balance experienced social progress and perhaps we have become complacent. Even in the bleakest days following the Sep 11 attacks I felt that unity and inclusion were not at risk and that the forces of bigotry and hatred were fringe elements stuck in the shadows. Now I am not so certain. Now I feel like these forces have always been there and were waiting for an outlet to become the mainstream.

It is easy to see this as an overreaction – some commentary I have seen claim that the Muslim ban is not all-encompassing and the wall is meant to target illegal immigration. Even if you agree with this limited scope interpretation of the executive orders, all Americans should be concerned  for every path to totalitarianism and fascism requires first steps of this nature. History is rife with such examples and we have seen it happen recently in places like Venezuela and Turkey. Different environments and scenarios, of course, but there is little to stop similar travesties in the United States. Even these elementary steps are a betrayal of the backbone of American greatness, which is, and always shall be, the diversity of its people.

It’s a well-worn mantra but an accurate one that American is a country of immigrants. There has always been backlash against immigrants (this is a human failing not an American one) but ultimately they become a part of the social fabric to enrich the community and evolve the American identity. I am the child of naturalized Americans. We make this country better. My friends are children of immigrants, or immigrants themselves: they make this country better. Once you target any one group of immigrants, you target all of us. You target yourself. You target your friends, and your family, and your co-workers.

The environment of intolerance and mistrust and violent hatred has been simmering for some time but we must not let it continue. We must not let our government sanctify and codify bigotry and isolationism. We may disagree on other fundamental concerns but let us at least be united in this: the preservation of our national identity. Isolationist politics is not American; diversity is the very foundation of America.

I fear that this is like shouting into a gale, the violent winds swallowing my words so that they are forgotten and disregarded. I know not what to do and there is a hopelessness that comes from a widening social divide that will sacrifice our core values and our core identity if we are not careful. At the core of my own character and my own identity is an unflinching and staunch belief in tolerance and consideration of others; it is growing up and living in the US that has made me into such a person. I only hope that the pride I have in this country is not misplaced and betrayed.